I had a mind once. Now I have small children.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Father's Day

Father:  [fah-ther]

1.  A male parent.

Again, gods of the word world, I must criticize your lack of definition.  As with the word Mother, you have sorely missed the mark on the word Father.  Allow me to throw my definition into the ring...

Father: [fah-ther]

1.  A man who gives up all of his spare time to entertain the small beings that he helped create.

2.  A male who, upon seeing his psychotic wife crying and frantically waving a pee stick in the air, comes down from a rooftop, gives her a hug and says he is excited for this next step in life. 

3.  A man who learns every character from every Mario game that Nintendo has ever invented, just so he can spend "quality time" with his son.

4.  A man who patiently spends every evening, under a heavy comforter, playing "cave" with his son, because it creates memories that they will both cherish forever.  
5.  A male, who loves his daughter so much, that he creates an account when she is born, so that he can put away enough money to give her a dream wedding when she meets her Prince Charming.

6.  A man who looks at the finances every month, wondering where the money is going to come from, but still works to give his children the world.  

7.   A male who loves steak, salad, and baked potatoes, but gives it up to eat chicken nuggets, french fries, and canned peaches with his kids.

8.  A man who gives up his Soloflex routine for "Big Birdie Birdie" and piggy back rides.

9.  A husband (or partner) that thinks the stretchmarks and curves his wife earned during pregnancy are the most beautiful marks on her body.

10.  A man who goes out with friends for a bachelor night, and comes home, kisses all his babies and tucks them in, and crawls into bed with his wife and says he wouldn't trade his life for all the bachelor nights in the world.  

Bowser, without you as my partner, I would never be able to do this parenting thing.  Your picture should be next to the definition of Father in the dictionary.  I love you.  Happy Father's day!


1 comment:

  1. What a great post for Father's Day!!