Anyone who knows me, knows that I am not the best housekeeper in the world. I try, I really do. But, there is just so much else I would rather do than clean. I do, however, have my standards and my pet peeves. I think my biggest household pet peeve is socks. As in, dirty socks that are thrown all around my house. I swear the Goombas put on socks, just so they can take them off and throw them willy-nilly all around our downstairs level. I find them sticking out from under the refrigerator, in the pantry by the cereal, all over the entry way, in between couch cushions... I mean everywhere. And I hate it. Toys on the floor, fine, whatever. Crumbs here and there, I can sweep those up in an instant. Socks on the floor. Forget it. It makes me insane.
To be honest, I just really don't like socks at all. They make your feet hot. They get lost in the washing machine and/or dryer. They get holes in them. They are usually ugly. There is nothing more annoying than having to pair them up and roll them into their stupid little sock balls. Oh, and did I mention, they lie around all over the floor of my house? I digress...
Tonight I had enough. I came downstairs from putting the younger two Goombas to bed. I was exhausted and I was ready to plop my butt down on the couch with my glass of wine and watch the debate. (Really, I would rather watch something else, but I'm pretty sure it will be on every channel.) Anyhow, I came downstairs, ready for quiet time, and when I walked into my living room there were socks scattered all over the room. And I'm pretty sure that is when my head exploded.
Poor Mario. He was innocently sitting at the kitchen table doing homework and since his brother and sister were in bed, he had to suffer the wrath. (Side note: It's not that he is innocent of the sock tossing, but really, I feel bad about what happened next...)
It went a little something like this...
Me: That is IT!!!! Listen up Mario and Bowser. And I will tell Luigi and Peach in the morning. From now on, if I find one of your socks on the floor, I am going to make you EAT IT!!!!
Mario: (voice shaky) What?
Me: You heard me. I am sick of socks on the floor. From now on, if it is your sock that I find, I will be frying it up and you will be EATING IT!
Bowser: blank stare from the kitchen. blink, blink.
Me: I am NOT EVEN KIDDING. You all are going to get a lot of sock dinners around here.
Mario: sniffle, sniffle
Me: ARE YOU CRYING???
Mario: You are scaring me! I don't wanna EAT MY SOCKS!!!!!
Ok, ok. So, maybe it was a little over the top. But, come on kids! I can't take it any more! All I ask is that when you take off your socks, you toss them in the basket in the laundry room. It's not that difficult!
There you have it. I made my 9-year-old cry by telling him I was going to force him to eat his own dirty socks. Another not-so-proud parenting moment brought to you by Daisy.