First, I borrowed a sewing machine from a friend. Now, I haven't actually used a sewing machine since I was in 8th grade Home Ec., but I figured it out then, I should be able to figure it out now. Then Peach and I went to the store and looked at some fabric. She picked a lovely Barbie print so that I could make a pillow for her. We decided not to buy any fabric for her brothers until they were there to choose for themselves. Then, I picked a lovely beige canvas-y, burlap-y cotton to make throw pillows for my couches. I also bought a little handheld seam-stitcher thing. You know, so I could sit on the couch and watch tv while I made my covers. I was so excited to get started! Finally! Something that I can post on Pinterest that I actually made! And I will brag about how EASY it was, and how it is something that ANYONE can do. Can you see where this is going?
After Peach was dropped off at preschool, I came in and got to work. I pulled out the machine, turned it on and looked at it for a while. No thread. Ok. No problem. I know there is something about a bobbin... It took a while of me just looking at diagrams on the machine before I finally thought, "oh yeah! Try the instruction book!" Stupid book. That was NO help. Might as well have been written in alien language. I mean, what is a presser foot and who needs a throat plate anyway? But, I was starting to feel a little desperate. I wanted to avoid asking Bowser for any help. This is women's territory, right? But, I knew that if I could just get the damn thing threaded, I would be good to go. Bowser came out, took a look at it and said, "Just YouTube it." Ok. Good idea. So, I finally find a video where the person seems like she actually knows what is up with a sewing machine. I watch it, then go back and pause it at the appropriate times so that I can do what she is doing. I get my bobbin ready, I push in the clutch (seriously, don't these things come in automatics by now?) and--PING!!!! The presser foot comes flying off and there is only half a needle left on the machine. Since this was a borrowed machine, I just quietly put everything back together and back into the box. And don't worry Mrs. T. I will get you a new needle. Just don't ask me to put it in for you.
But, I was not defeated yet! I still had that handle little seam-stitcher thingy. By this time, although not defeated, I was starting to lose some confidence. So, I figured, I'll make Peach's pillow first. The Barbie fabric is very forgiving with all that pattern on it, and she won't care if there are a few little mistakes. I'm not even going to go into detail about what happened next. I'll just say that I practically sewed my head to my elbow and still missed half the stitches around the pillow. As I told the Zaz this evening, "It is the ugliest damn pillow you have ever seen, and NOT because of the neon patterned fabric." There are lumps and strange seams and loose threads everywhere. Why? Because I couldn't even figure out how to tie off the end of a stitch.
So, basically, my fantastic idea, that should have taken (according to the directions on Pinterest) about 30 minutes, turned into a three-hour affair, with lots of swearing and not much to show for it. I guess it is a good thing I didn't buy the pattern for the adorable little dress that I thought would be OH SO EASY to make for Peach. But, I guess we can't all be perfect at everything. Needless to say, I will NOT be asking for that Singer sewing machine this holiday season.
Don't look too closely. The craftsmanship might hurt your eyes.
Cheers!
~Daisy
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