I had a mind once. Now I have small children.

Monday, March 7, 2016

A Final Farewell from Daisy

Yes, it has been a long time since I have posted.  Truth is, well, the Goombas are growing up and spare moments are few and far between.  But, I think about this blog often.  I think about how it helped me through those crazy years of small children, the years that I thought would never end  The years when I thought that grapes on the floor, peeled crayons, Just-A-Viruses, and endless chicken nugget lunches would never end.  I think about how when all else was falling apart, I could dissect these crazy moments of motherhood down to a giggle, just to make it through the day.  I think about how little my Mario, Luigi, and Peach were.  And then, somehow, in the midst of... well, everything... those years are gone.  Poof.  Just like that.

Today is Mario's thirteenth birthday.  THIRTEEN.  Yes... 1-freaking-3.  Holy Hades.  And just like that -- *snap*-- we have a teenager.  Remember the time on his 9th birthday that I wanted so badly to make him a fancy pancake breakfast, but instead, the pancakes looked more like phallic symbols?  Or how about the time that out of the blue he started calling everyone "dude?"  Maybe the time I scared the bejeezus out of him by threatening to cook his socks if I found them laying all over the floor again?  Yep.  That all happened.  And I am so glad I have the blogs to prove it.

See, here is the thing...  Everyone tells you, "don't blink!  They grow up so fast!  Don't wish it away!  Cherish every moment!"  But, in reality, every day can drag on for years.  When your entire existence is cleaning up the same mess, the same laundry, going to the same park, watching the same kids' shows every single day... those days can last FOR. EV. ER.  So, when someone says, "Oh, hug them now because that won't last forever," you kinda want to kick 'em in the taco.  Apparently they forgot what life is like with 3 younglings.  Or maybe they never knew.  Either way, it is not comforting to a mom in the midst of it all. 

But, I will admit, also, that in the throes of early toddlerhood, a tired mother is apt to forget the little moments.  And so, I really encourage you moms out there to WRITE IT DOWN!  I love that you all read my little blog, but if I am going to be very, very frank with you, I wrote this for ME.  I love looking back and seeing all of those things that I maybe didn't get a picture of, or that I maybe would forget about because it wasn't a milestone.  I love that I can see how my role as a mother has evolved over the years.  I love that I can look back and see that Bowser and I made it through TOGETHER, even though there may have been times when things were touch and go.  I love that I can share these stories with my Goombas, when they someday have little Goombas of their own and they feel like no one else "gets it." 

This blog was my safe place.  My place to write down what I couldn't even always process in my head at the time.  It was a place to remind myself that we are all people, that no one is perfect.  To let myself get out the emotion that would have otherwise been bottled up inside, festering and rotting my gut away.

Anyway, the point of this is that Mario is 13 now.  Luigi is 8.  Peach is 7.  I no longer have those little minions that follow me into the bathroom every single time. Ok, Ok, they still do sometimes, but now it is more of an "Oh sick, Mom!  What is wrong with you?" than an "I will just camp out and play here at your feet until you are done!"  They are fairly self-sufficient.  They can speak to me in words that I can almost always understand.  They get themselves dressed for school and brush their own teeth without (too much) prodding. 

I still have so much more that I want to share, but the fact that they can read and be embarrassed has basically squashed the public blogging.  But, I will always try to remember to write it down.  Not just the first loves and heartbreaks, or championship games, or amazing test scores, or first cars, or whatever...  But, also the little things.  Mario loves to describe anything soccer to me in MINUTE detail.  Luigi still giggles uncontrollably if the word FART enters a conversation.  Peach still asks me to snuggle with her at night and talk about what happy dreams we will have.  I have to remember all of this, because THIS TOO SHALL PASS. 

This too shall pass.  It has before and it will again.

Signing off now,
Cheers always,

PS-- Bowser read this and said, "What?  Are you dying?"  ha!  And just for the record, NO, I am not dying.  Just, ya know... wanted to give myself some closure.  A little nudge to say, "time to move on to the next chapter."  Love and hugs to all!  xoxo

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