I had a mind once. Now I have small children.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Thanksgiving Vacation

Mommy’s Log: Family trip. First stop--visit with the Franks. Final destination--Zaz and Pop’s house for Turkey Day.

Day 1:
We planned to leave at 4 a.m. this morning. We finally got out the door at 5:30. We are currently on the long, straight and BORING stretch of highway that makes up 90% of our drive. So far, we have had no sleeping Goombas, an almost flat tire, and a breakfast of Corn Nuts and Dr. Pepper. This is going to be a great trip.
I put some movies in the magical DVD players to occupy the Goombas for a while. Bowser and I like to use this time when we are trapped together in the car to talk. We started talking about songs and how our tastes can change as we get older. Here is the conversation that followed….

Me: You know what song I used to hate, but now I love? “Boys of Summer,” by Don Henley
Bowser: WHAT?!?!?!?! Hahahahahahaha!!! Call your Dad and tell him that! Boys of summer?
(**sidenote: I am notorious for getting song lyrics wrong. Bowser and Pop love to laugh at my interpretation of the lyrics.)
Me: Why? That is the song! (I proceed to sing the chorus)
Bowser: Oh. Ok, then.
Me: What on earth did you THINK he said???
Bowser: Poison Summer.
And I have been laughing ever since.

4:30 p.m.
Finally arrive at the Franks. Bowser and Mr. Frank rekindle their bromance. The Goombas run around like caged animals that have finally been set free. Mrs. Frank and I commiserate over how our once clean and semi-stylish homes have become more like day-care centers, with toys and diapers and bottles everywhere. We eat delicious food and laugh a lot. At bedtime, Luigi and Peach decide they are not going to sleep, unless I lay down in between them and hold their hands. Two hours later, after my lovely beer buzz fades, they finally pass out from sheer exhaustion.

Day 2
Wake up to a yummy breakfast, courtesy Mrs. Frank. Head out of town to visit the college where Bowser and I met. Get sad and weepy and totally nostalgic over the fun times we had. College, I miss you, I love you, let me come back to you!!!! Get back on the road and head to the Zaz and Pop’s.

2 hours later
Goombas still not sleeping. What the heck? For the love of all things holy, just take a nap!!!!

10 minutes later
Goombas sleeping. Mommy sleeping. Have fun driving, Bowser!

3 p.m.
Arrive at the Zaz and Pop’s house. Release the wild animals. Someone please air that nasty smell out of the van. Oh, and let’s not forget, the week-long food fest begins. Pop hands Bowser a scotch and me a beer. The Goombas cling to their grandparents. Aaaaahhhhh…..

Day 3
Cashew Kitty. Because, damn it, no matter how many health violations that place gets, you just cannot go home without eating Cashew Kitty. Yum Yum!

Day 4
The entire family arrives. Mario goes nuts over the fact that his uncles will be there. Mostly because his Godfather is almost as much of a Nintendo nut as he is. Insanity ensues.

Day 5
The Day of the Turkey! I’m not sure if there is more food on the table or liquor at the bar. Either way, it is totally awesome. Let’s just say, I started out wearing super cute skinny jeans. I ended up in stretchy pants before dessert. Thanks Zaz and Pop for all the awesome food. (If you want to know all that I am thankful for, check it out here.)

Day 6
Since we didn’t eat enough on any of the previous days, we decided to go eat a crab leg buffet. I think we might have actually frightened the waitress with how many crab legs one family could eat. The Goombas got to see the jolly, red, fat man, Mr. Clause. Luigi just stared wide-eyed at him and could barely speak—which is saying a lot for Luigi.

Day 7
Back home again. We can hardly wait to pile up in the van again. The trip home is fairly uneventful. Except for the fact that Luigi seems to only have to use the potty right after we pass the only rest area for the next 100 miles. We left #1, and even a #2, at various spots along the interstate. Hey, when a 3-year-old has to go, he has to go. After about 13 hours, we made it home safe and sound. The Koopa Troopas were happy to see us, although immediately had to hide under the bed because Luigi and Peach wanted to show them how much they were missed. Bowser dragged in all of our, ummm...stuff from the van. I bathed the road-skank off the young ones and put them to bed. Then we collapsed on the couch and passed out almost instantly.

It was a great week and a good time was had by all.

Ok, Christmas, I'm ready for you. Bring it on, Santa.


No comments:

Post a Comment